This is especially true if your previous unanswered text was about trying to set up plans. You also don’t want to invite her out as your first message back to her. It also makes it feel like you’re hung up on why she didn’t respond. Pushing her to reply to that specific idea or checking on her like you’re her dad isn’t exciting. This girl stopped responding after your last message FOR A REASON. Even when you think you’re being sarcastic about her lack of reply, you’re coming off as passive-aggressive and bitter. “Not sure if you got my last message but I was wondering what your plans were for Thursday?” “So what did you end up doing Thursday?” “I guess sitting at home and not talking to anyone then =P” Your natural inclination may be to double-check if she received your message or repeat the same topic.įor example, perhaps she went silent after you asked her what she’s doing on Thursday. I know you might feel lost when reinitiating with a girl who went quiet. Don’t ask if she got your last text or talk about the same thing Hit her up within a few days and follow the ideas below for your message. If this is just the first time she’s stopped responding, there’s no point in playing the waiting game and potentially missing your window of opportunity. Some women will reinitiate contact but many more, even ones that are interested, won’t. If you genuinely want to connect with this girl and are pulling away to manipulate her approval of you - you’re being needy.Īnother reason is that guys feel they put enough in effort and now it’s the girl’s turn to respond. But as I’ve said before, neediness comes down to your mindset. One reason guys do this is to avoid appearing needy and desperate. They decide not to message for multiple days, weeks, or ever again - even if this was the first time she went cold. That said, a lot of guys go the opposite of intense messaging and instead distance themselves completely. But don’t wait more than 2-3 days to text again He’s not sitting at home agonizing over the response time of a girl he barely knows. He’s going to be productive, hang out with friends, do something fun for himself, and talk to other women. He might think, “that sucks” when he doesn’t get a reply…but then he’s going to focus on something else. Rather, I want you to put yourself in the shoes of a confident man with options who’s not seeking approval.
I’m not saying to pretend like you’re cool and aloof. It feels overbearing and like you’ve got nothing better to do. If she did see the message and is waiting or choosing not to respond, your follow-up often reinforces that she shouldn’t reply. If she didn’t see the message and you ping her again, it feels like you’re desperate for a response. She wants to make sure you’re not too intense, needy, or overly invested. When a woman is talking to a new guy, she’s cautious about the situation. Regardless of the reason, hitting her up again within 24 hours almost never yields good results. Or maybe she just became bored of the conversation. Maybe she is waiting to respond because it’s not her top priority in the moment. Maybe she did but she’s busy with work, study, or something else in the real world. Unless your phone says otherwise, it’s almost guaranteed that she received it. Give her a day to reply before you send another textĪssume that your message was delivered successfully. Related video (don’t forget to subscribe!)ġ. To give you the best shot, I created a simple framework to follow next time you don’t hear back from a girl you like. Instead, focus on a plan of action to get the conversation going again. Stop dwelling on the fact that she hasn’t responded. The point is, my advice will always be to… There are countless reasons a girl goes MIA. So when guys reach out to me asking, “Why didn’t she text back?” I can only make educated guesses about a woman’s motivations. Unfortunately, there were no clear answers then and there are no clear answers now. Ten years later, I now know that worrying about it was a waste of time.
I’d check my phone constantly, worry about whether or not I should send another text, and always wonder WHY…why is she not talking to me? In hindsight, I spent WAY too much time stressing and analyzing my rollercoaster of emotions. And when she never replied at all - realizing that our connection was potentially dead in the water. I also remember that nothing was more nerve-racking than waiting for a reply. It always felt like the start of something good. When I first started dating, nothing was more exciting than the rush of flirting with a new girl over text.